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Why Do We Use Euphemisms for Death?

In our desire to protect people from pain, we often 
"couch" our words....does that help?

Words on a board showing that verbiage can be direct or confusing.

Death and dying are a part of life but for most people those words elicit discomfort.    No one likes to add to the hurt and pain of someone by being too direct.  


How often have you used - or heard someone say "passed or passed away?"


Resting in peace or in a better place?


Was called home?


Kicked the bucket?  


Gave up the ghost?


The list goes on as often characterized by a culture, location, or the individual.  And how comfortable you as the speaker are with your feelings about death will temper your comments.  Is it easier for you to say that you are sorry that your Dad "didn't make it" instead of coming out and saying "he died?"





A photograph of many books open to pages full of words.
Words - the language we share - may sound differently to the receiver than you intended.  

It is very difficult to know that what you are saying is being received as you wished.  

We can avoid saying "dead" because we want to deny it.  Denial can help - at least in the short term.

If you believe in certain faiths, the real part of death is the afterlife.  If someone says that your parent "went to be with the Lord" that may be a heartfelt reminder that they believe that the afterlife is better.  That person may not be using the term as avoidance but rather as love.

However, if you have to be very clear about what it is happening - like when a critical medical decision is being made based on the prognosis.  You must be direct so that there is no misunderstanding.  Hospice and medical staff receive ongoing training on how important direct communication is in such cases.

also

phone handset dangling off cord
By Debbie Pepin 17 May, 2021
We have countless jokes online and in person about nonstop phone calls at all hours begging you to extend your car warranty - even when you don't own a car! But we don't talk about death. AND we all have death in common!
night orange moon over trees
By Debbie Pepin 09 Mar, 2021
Upon death, even if your legal paperwork is completed will there be problems? Tell others about your wishes. Make changes as often as you want but be sure your loved ones know. Problems arise when loved ones disagree. Money can do that to wills.
snow on ground trees ice
By Debbie Pepin 23 Feb, 2021
You don't have to discuss death daily. Yet you need to face that we all will die. Give yourself a rest sometimes but remember that each day is precious.
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